Tuesday, February 18, 2014

TMI Tuesday, Adventures in Breast Feeding

I'm introducing TMI Tuesdays where I'll provide you with way too much information about myself that you probably wish you didn't know.  My kids tell me I'm really good at providing TMI.  They tell me this constantly, so it must be true.  I'm not sure that I'll have TMI Tuesday every Tuesday, but at least once a month.

The idea came about after reading several (thousand, it feels like) books on what/how to blog and/or creatively write about.  One of the suggested topics was "Your Greatest Humiliations."  I think the author of that book thought I might have had two, maybe three, great humiliations over the course of my life.  Obviously, that author does not know me.  I seem to humiliate myself on a daily basis.  I'm a total klutz.  I can't remember names, even my best friend's name most of the time.  That's always awkward!  I was born with my foot in my mouth so I'm constantly saying things I shouldn't.  I lock myself out of the house.  I forget my wallet....  So, okay, you get the picture.  I don't need to babble on about the massive ways I can easily humiliate myself.  Luckily, I'm also capable of laughing at myself.

So, in honor of my son's 19th birthday tomorrow, I thought I'd share one humiliating experience revolving around his birth.  And believe me, there were a LOT of humiliating experiences centered around his introduction into this world.  I could write a book!  But today, let's talk about learning to breast feed.  Always a fun (and potentially embarrassing) topic!

So, there I was, hanging out in the hospital after delivering my first child by c-section.  I was still hooked to IV's & catheters and all kinds of fun stuff.  I was trying, rather unsuccessfully, to breast feed my new bouncing baby boy (who was so big [10.5 lbs] he won the prize for largest newborn in the hospital.)  A male nurse was in the room checking on my beeps & drips and apparently noticed I was struggling.  With absolutely no other warning, he simply said, "Here," grabbed my breast with one hand & the baby's head with the other & smashed the two together.  Luckily, it worked!  But because of the embarrassment of this strange guy grabbing my boob, it took me a few minutes to realize that the squawking baby wasn't squawking anymore & was instead happily chomping & biting sucking away at my breast.


Happy Birthday, Zack.  It's been a fun & exciting 19 years & I look forward to the next 19.

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